Exploring Different Parenting Styles and Effective Strategies for Nurturing Children

Pooja Unadkat
5 min readAug 11, 2021

Introduction: Parenting styles play a crucial role in shaping the growth and development of children. There are four main parenting styles:

  • Authoritative(more support and more rules)
  • Authoritarian(less support and more rules)
  • Permissive(more support and fewer rules
  • Uninvolved(less support and fewer rules)

Each type differs in the level of support and rules provided to children. This article will delve into these styles and provide valuable parenting tips to ensure a positive and nurturing environment for children.

Understanding Parenting Styles: According to a survey conducted in 2006, the distribution of parenting styles was as follows: 50% authoritative parents, 23% permissive parents, 19% authoritarian parents, and 8% uninvolved parents. These results indicate that half of the parents employ a definitive style, which combines support and rules for optimal child development. While regulations may sometimes be challenging for children, parental consent creates a sense of safety and security. Rules also instil essential values and manners that prepare children for the real world. These findings highlight the importance of encouraging parents to establish rules and actively monitor their children’s activities.

Parenting Tips for Positive Child Development: Every parent and child is unique, with their own distinct needs and personalities. Every parent desires their child to grow as a gentle, healthy, happy, and successful individual. There is no single way to raise children, but some parents may need guidance to enhance their nurturing approach. This article sheds light on practical parenting tips to facilitate positive child development and prevent future setbacks.

Do’s:

  1. Appreciate and Praise: Acknowledge and praise your children when they exhibit good behaviour, such as helping others, showing respect, or completing tasks. Focusing on their positive actions helps reinforce discipline, naturally reducing negative behaviour.
  2. Celebrate Achievements: Children seek attention and recognition from their parents. Celebrate their small achievements, as even seemingly trivial things hold great significance for them. By acknowledging their accomplishments, you boost their confidence and self-esteem.
  3. Offer Choices: Many children rebel against constant directives and may develop a sense of powerlessness. Empower them by giving choices whenever appropriate. For instance, ask them which subject they want to tackle first or if they wish to take a break or continue playing. This cultivates their decision-making skills.

4. Embrace Positive Discipline: Based on Dr Jane Nelsen’s work, positive discipline emphasizes encouragement and problem-solving over traditional punishment techniques. Guide your child towards independent play and teach them healthy ways to express their emotions. When they are upset, empathize with them, offer comfort, and divert their attention to calming activities.

5. Be a Role Model: Children often mirror the behavior they see in their family. They are like sponges, absorbing everything we do and say. If we want our children to exhibit certain behaviors, we need to exemplify those behaviors ourselves. If we yell when we’re angry, our children will learn to do the same. If we show kindness and respect to others, they will pick up on those manners. Children are highly perceptive and tend to imitate the actions of the adults around them. Therefore, it is important to be someone a child can look up to and emulate.

Don’ts:

  1. Avoid Underestimating Them: Every child develops at their own pace, and not every child will reach milestones simultaneously. It’s crucial not to label a child as incapable or different if they are not meeting certain expectations. Parents should always be their child’s biggest supporters. Others’ opinions hold little significance compared to what parents believe and convey to their children. Parents can help build their child’s confidence and self-esteem by supporting and showing appreciation.
  2. Limit Saying “No” Constantly: While setting boundaries and not fulfilling the child’s every desire is essential, saying “no” to everything they ask can lead to frustration and a sense of deprivation. There will be instances where saying “yes” may not be feasible or safe. However, it is essential to empathize with their feelings and explain the reasons behind the decision. Let them know that while their request cannot be granted, you understand their perspective.
  3. Avoid Being Over-Protective: While protecting our children from harm is a parental responsibility, teaching them how to face and overcome challenges is equally important. We cannot shield them from every difficulty they may encounter in life. Children need opportunities to develop problem-solving skills as we have met and learned from our hardships. We can guide and support them through the process, but allowing them to face and learn from their problems is crucial. As Christine Carter, PhD, author and sociologist, aptly says, “Children have to deal with the fact that this world is full of flawed people.”
  4. Don’t Make Them People-Pleasers: Forcing children to conform to societal expectations or seeking validation from others can stifle their individuality and sense of self. It is essential to respect their comfort and choices, even if they differ from ours. If a child does not feel at ease hugging, kissing, or entertaining guests, they should not be coerced. It is essential to let them embrace their true selves and teach them that not everyone will like them, and that’s perfectly alright.
  5. Don’t Expect Perfection: It is unfair and unrealistic to expect perfection from our children. Labelling them as “good” or “bad” in certain areas can limit their growth and potential. Instead, we should focus on their progress and acknowledge their efforts. Our perception of our children can be clouded by flawed expectations, so it is crucial to accept them as they are and appreciate their unique qualities. By believing in them and allowing them to make mistakes, we can foster a positive environment for their development.

Conclusion: These insights and parenting tips are derived from my experiences as a learning parent. I believe they can be valuable to other parents navigating the rewarding yet ever-changing journey of parenthood. Parenting is an ongoing process, and it requires experimentation to find the approaches that work best for our individual children. All parents’ ultimate goal is to positively guide their children’s behaviour.

Thank you for taking the time to read this article.

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